if you don't like crystal castles, then you should be executed

Crystal Castles' "Vanished" as performed by Kings of Leon.

if i add a CD to my unspoken internal list of "best albums i've ever heard," it tends to come after a long period of introspection and doubt. by which i mean that i've listened to the CD, discarded the critical consensus solely for the sake of being contrary, accidentally heard the songs a few more times when they came up on shuffle, realized that the CD was actually fantastic, and begun acting as if i actually liked it since before it was released.

my love for crystal castle's self-titled LP arose out of an even longer period of introspection and doubt (i accidentally downloaded a CD of outtakes or B-sides or something before the album i was looking for, and thus repeated the above-mentioned process twice). at first i thought the whole 8-bit gimmick was incredibly silly and that crystal castles was another one of those bands which scenesters latch onto with seemingly no regard as to the quality of their music, one of those bands which tends to adhere more to the axioms and peccadillos of what makes pitchfork like you rather than, you know, making music that's actually fun or interesting to listen to.

(side note: how come 9/10ths of all indie bands being released nowadays have that weird chamber-pop aesthetic going, but then they just sort of drop the "pop" side of the equation to produce tunes that wouldn't sound out of place in a victorian england sitting parlor but for the incomprehensible lyrics? and what's with the whole "beach boys vocal harmony" thing that every new indie band does nowadays? yes, panda bear's album was pitchfork's number one album of the year in 2007, but what people seem to have forgotten is that this album is terrible).

anyways, i wised up and realized that this album is actually sick. i like how crystal castles seems really tuned in to the idea of making fun music, rather than sticking to a particular rhythm or melodic scheme. you have the rave-induced stylings of "untrust us" and "black panther," the quasi-dance music of "courtship dating" and "air war," and the amped-up screams in "alice practice" and "love and caring" (note: almost all of these are fan videos, so at least half of them are going to be hilariously shitty).

my favorite song is "vanished," which i've helpfully embedded up top, so now you have no excuse to not like this band.

in closing: at this point in time, i can only think of a few things that canada has produced which were worth exporting. poutine. kristen kreuk. rick moranis (i dare you to tell me that you don't appreciate "honey i blew up the baby"). and now, CRYSTAL CASTLES.

vote crystal castles' self-titled LP for best album of 2008!